Wandering in the desert. 

For many years I felt like I was wandering in the desert. Searching for something that I could not find. My life felt empty, and my insecurities ravaged my mind.
Why was I here?

Did I have a purpose?

Does anyone care?
Often times I would listen to that voice inside me that said I was no good. That I didn’t have a purpose, and that I should just end it all.
I struggled with insecurities. I didn’t believe that anything I did was of any value to the rest of the world. That my life (or my existence) would make any impact in the lives of others in this world.
I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to “change the world, but I didn’t know how, and I figured I never would.

Then I came across this scripture, 

Matthew 11:28-30New Living Translation (NLT)

28 Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

I remember thinking, Gosh, I am exhausted! I am so tired of all this garbage in my life. I need someone to give me rest.
What I didn’t realize was that all I had to do was ask. In the scripture above, Jesus is teaching about being thankful, then he openly called the people to come to him to receive the rest that they needed. Then followed it up by saying that “His yoke was easy and his burden was light.”
I remember this hunger in my soul for this kind of rest. To be able to relax and enjoy the things around me.
Thankfully, I had some very wise folks around me to invest in me, and help me understand that the stress I was feeling, was actually a spiritual battle raging for my soul.
You see, most times when we feel depressed, or worthless, or undervalued, that is the enemy of our souls, trying to convince us that Jesus’s sacrificial death has no value. What do I mean? The devil wants you to believe that you have no value. That your life is worth nothing. Therefore, there couldn’t possibly be a God who loves you , that would send his only son to a horrific death for the eradication of your sinful life.

But, truth is…
There is.
And he did just that.
See, when Jesus calls to us in our scripture to “Come to him” it’s because he has already won the battle against Depression, anxiety and even Death!!
All we have to do is respond. say “Yes Jesus, I need your rest. I accept your sacrificial death. Take this depression and anxiety from me. Let me live again.”
And he will.
It’s that simple.
He changed my life, and he can change yours.
Just ask.
What do you think?
Till next week,
PJ.

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